Thursday, September 06, 2012

2 Testaments, 1 Meathead

With all the GOD bothering at the Conventions this year, there seems to be little attention paid to what GOD they're bothering.

The first thing you realize when you start to pay attention to the Bible (you remember, the week you accidentally stayed awake in Sunday School) is that it is 2 completely different books. Somewhere between the Old & New Testaments, GOD had a deepthink & rolled out a completely different program.

The Old, the version of Tampa, was an angry paternal GOD concerned with enforcing obedience from his people.  His people strove in extremely weird & violent ways. One of my favorite books is Jonah. Jonah was sent to preach in Ninev
ah. Oddly enough, he was a big hit, everyone repented, and GOD spared the place.

But it displeased Jonah exceedingly, and he was very angry.

From there it gets sillier. Jonah wanted people to suffer, Darn it to Heck!

This basic story, repeated many times, usually with GOD wreaking destruction, is the recurring theme.

Most of us are more familiar with GOD II : Queen of the Dance. She's the one the Nuns brought to Charlotte, with a simple message:

Dear friend, do not imitate what is evil but what is good. Anyone who does what is good is from God. Anyone who does what is evil has not seen God.

Which is pretty much how I see things now. Of course, there's a third player : Reality. Reality will sweep away whatever we do pretty quickly, but for now, consider the Book of Lear. When Archie Bunker explained that there was conspiracy among the women, Jews, Hippies, unions, atheists, blacks & Mexicans to take over the country, Mike got his only good line of the series : Arch, they ARE the country.

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